Friday, August 11, 2006

A comparison of victim and martyr characteristics

Victim:
1. Usually has short-term problem
------Martyr:
Long-term problem

Victim:
2. Motivated to change
------Martyr:
Stuck in their problem

Victim:
3. Rights violated by others
------Martyr:
Rights violated by others

Victim:
4. Did not choose the problem
------Martyr:
Chooses to remain in problem situation

Victim:
5. Never complains
------Martyr:
Complains all the time

Victim:
6. Lacks insight into problem
------Martyr::
Frequently has insight into the problem

Victim:
7. Unknowingly plays an active part in the problem
------Martyr:
Frequently knowingly plays an active part in the problem

Victim:
8. Doesn't often seek help
------Martyr:
Seeks help all the time

Victim:
9. Wants to ``let go'' of problem
------Martyr:
``Holds on to'' the problem

Victim:
10. Guilt free
------Martyr:
Guilt driven

Victim:
11. Solution oriented
------Martyr:
Problem oriented

Victim:
12. Powerless due to lack of knowledge
------Martyr:
Powerless out of a free will choice to be so

this list was from http://www.coping.org/relations/martyr.htm#difference

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